The Birds…Avian Violence for Your Mobile

By Esther Koo

So I seem to have lost some of my long range vision and about a full day’s worth of my life in exchange for conquering the first 105 levels Angry Birds.
I’m not sure whether that’s good or bad. I don’t know whether to be ashamed, afraid or proud. All I know is that even though I love the game, I resent the game and the resentment only fuels the addiction. This is me digging deep to give you the full experience of the Angry Birds coup that can occur in one’s life.
The stats say I and the rest of the Angry Bird victims are normal. They say that 55% percent of social gamers are women–not only women but middle-aged women. They also say that 75% of casual game purchases originate from women. Another survey posts different info and references here: http://theclik.characterarcade.com/game-types/puzzle/casual-gamers-gain-strength.php.These numbers may vary according to the source but ultimately, they all point to the same conclusion–women are into games. In that vein, I’d like to introduce you to the game in the off chance you haven’t played it already because it’s a good one.
Loud and proud, sisters–we all need some time away from the stresses of life ie. the frustration of not being able to hurl exploding birds at your husband when he can’t be bothered to do life-sustaining chores because a group of big men insist on running into each other over and over again on the television. He’s got football. We’ve got Angry Birds.
It’s pretty much the top selling app across platforms and every time I get on the New York subway, I see people playing it. That’s how I know things are cool–by watching people on the subway. I think that means I’m uncool. I digress.
The Story of the Game:
The back story is that a group of evil pigs have stolen the beloved eggs of a bunch of birds. These birds are pissed and on a mission to get back their eggs and they aren’t afraid to fight Kamikaze style. On each level, a number of pigs are encased in some sort of a structure, which may or may not include glass, wood and concrete. You’re allotted a certain number of birds with varying talents that you can hurl from a slingshot toward the enemy.

Your Weapons:
Through your play, you can unlock different kinds of birds.
Red: No tricks.
Yellow: Tap mid-flight for super speed. Especially handy for destroying wood.
Blue: Tap mid-flight to disperse into three birds for extra destruction.
Black: Tap to explode or let it hit the structure, break through and blow up when it’s good and ready. This bird has the most bang for its buck and it will blast through concrete.
Black & White: Tap to drop an egg explosion. This will also go through concrete but only one layer.
Green: Apparently there’s a boomeranging green bird but I haven’t unlocked it yet, which makes me feel inferior so I’m going to have to play some more after I finish this post so I can live up to my parents’ expectations for greatness.

Your Targets:
Mini pigs
Normal pigs
Pigs with helmets
Really really big pigs
Challenges:
Of these targets, only the pigs with helmets have made me angry at times. More than the pigs, the protective structures are what make me want to go postal. So…many…blocks.

The Goal:
Destroy all the green pigs using as few birds and possible. If you can kill all the pigs with one bird (this process is akin to a domino effect), you get three stars. That means you’re a good person who deserves to be loved by the Angry Birds.
At this point, I’ve abandoned my aspirations for good and just want to move on to the next level. I realize my skills are limited and I need to take the victories, even the fluke ones, and run before my birds revolt and exile me as a fraud general killing all her troops (I’m sorry Birds).
Overall Emotions During Play:
It’s absorbing. Sometimes, I catch my body contorting to tilt the screen to try and influence the bird to fly a certain way. I know in my head that’s not how it works but my body doesn’t care. There’s definitely some strange toe-curling during points of high anxiety.
It’s challenging. I’ve had to lose many many times to pass certain levels and that makes me angry. So angry in fact, I have to stop playing. But I go back every time. It’s masochistic.
It’s a rollercoaster. I can relax when all the pigs are dead but until then, there is frustration and anxiety. Can I do it? Have I come as far as I can?
It’s victorious. I’ve conquered level after level even though they can be difficult. That makes me feel like I’ve accomplished something even though I’ve achieved nothing except the some time away from the busy thoughts in my head.
Maybe that’s a worthy achievement after all. 🙂

Overview:

Pros:

• Fun
• Challenge
• Distraction

Cons:

• Huge time suck
• May harm long range vision
• Carpal tunnel

Need Help?

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