{"id":6915,"date":"2012-05-13T09:58:31","date_gmt":"2012-05-13T02:58:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wellconnectedmom.com\/blog\/?p=6915"},"modified":"2012-05-13T09:58:31","modified_gmt":"2012-05-13T02:58:31","slug":"a-mothers-testimony-recounted","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wellconnectedmom.com\/blog\/a-mothers-testimony-recounted\/","title":{"rendered":"A Mother’s Testimony Recounted"},"content":{"rendered":"

by Lori Cunningham<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Editor’s Note:<\/strong> \u00a0A Mother’s Day Flashback….A reprint of my Mother’s Testimony…<\/span><\/p>\n

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Ahhh Mother’s Day.\u00a0\u00a0Mother’s Day is my third favorite holiday (Christmas and Easter are my top\u00a02). \u00a0Mother’s Day is a day I relish because of the great joy my children bring to me. \u00a0I am so thankful for them and to God for blessing me with my little angels. \u00a0Along time ago, I remember waking up one morning and feeling like my heart was singing. \u00a0It was that moment I knew that I was ready for children.<\/p>\n

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The Best Laid Plans….<\/span><\/h2>\n

I began thinking of names and figuring out which characters we would put up on the walls in the room I had set aside for the baby. \u00a0There was only one problem, I wasn’t getting pregnant. \u00a0Hmmm, that’s not how life and planning out your life is supposed to work. \u00a0No worries, it will happen. \u00a0Two years later, nothing happened. \u00a0And so the journey of infertility had laid its course.<\/p>\n

For a couple of years we went through artificial\u00a0insemination\u00a0and\u00a0in-vitro. \u00a0I remember seeing pictures of in-vitro on TV as a kid…a baby made in a\u00a0petri\u00a0dish…and I thought how sad, how scientific. \u00a0All of a sudden, I was one of those people putting hope in this scientific approach.<\/p>\n

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Needles Anyone?<\/span><\/h2>\n

\"healthcare,injections,medicalIt’s only by God’s grace that I made it through the whole\u00a0ordeal. \u00a0Sticking myself with needles, rushing unmarked brown bags to the laboratory, and praying endlessly that this expensive, highly emotional venture would end soon. \u00a0We paid ahead of time for two in-vitro attempts. \u00a0The first attempt resulted in 8 embryos. \u00a0After a lot of prayer, I opted for all 8 embryos to be inserted. \u00a0Now mind you, today, you probably couldn’t do that for fear of becoming the next octuplet mom. \u00a0I couldn’t bear the thought of any of those embryos being destroyed one day.<\/p>\n

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Elation to Deflation<\/span><\/h2>\n

After the insertion, I went straight back to work and tried not to think about it too much. \u00a0A number of\u00a0weeks later we were so excited to hear that I was pregnant! \u00a0Woohoo! \u00a0I can remember feeling so overfilled with joy. \u00a0I saw the doctor every week and was elated\u00a0to hear our baby’s heartbeat. \u00a0The 9 week check-up was special because it would be the day I “graduated” from the specialist and could see a normal (less expensive) OB\/GYN. \u00a0I was over-the-top excited to see the doctor on that day. \u00a0As normal, he turned on the ultrasound and began looking for the heartbeat…which was always so melodic to me. \u00a0Screeeeeeetch! \u00a0My world stopped as I heard the Dr. say, “I can’t find a heartbeat.” \u00a0I asked him to keep trying. \u00a0With his second confirmation, I found myself in a deep tunnel. \u00a0I stared straight ahead, motionless. \u00a0After all of those years of trying, we finally had gotten pregnant. \u00a0Now we lost our beautiful child.<\/p>\n

I’m sure many of you can relate to this. \u00a0You are at a total high and then the carpet gets ripped out from under you. \u00a0I refused to have the baby extracted. \u00a0I was still numb and needed time to\u00a0grieve. \u00a0I wanted my body to discharge our baby naturally. \u00a0Unfortunately, after two weeks, this still hadn’t happened and I needed to go in for a D&C. \u00a0I’ll never forget that day. \u00a0They tried to play Andrea Bocelli to sooth me. \u00a0To this day, I can’t listen to his beautiful music.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"floral,flowers,nature,numbers,numerals,plants,symbols,twos\"<\/p>\n

Round Two<\/span><\/h2>\n

The second round of in-vitro was tougher. \u00a0I waited about 4 months until I was more emotionally ready to try again. \u00a0Even still, I didn’t have a lot\u00a0of\u00a0hope and anticipation – which is what used to make the needles and discomfort more palatable. \u00a0Once again, we inserted a high number of embryos, five, \u00a0this time. \u00a0I remember feeling very thankful that we were \u00a0blessed\u00a0with many eggs during both in-vitro’s.<\/p>\n

I busied myself with different activities so I wouldn’t constantly worry as to\u00a01.) whether I would get pregnant and 2.) if I did, would it end up in miscarriage again. \u00a0As it turned out, I didn’t have to worry about either one. \u00a0The 5 embryos didn’t take. \u00a0 Sigh. \u00a0I couldn’t bear to take on any more in-vitro’s. \u00a0Emotionally, I was spent.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adoption?<\/span><\/h2>\n

The thought of open adoption gave me new hope. \u00a0My heart longed to love and care for a child, even several children. \u00a0We began down this path, prepared ahead of time knowing that there would likely be heartbreak ahead here too; \u00a0not being chosen right away, seeing our friends in the adoption program being chosen over us, having a birthmother choose us than dropping out at the last moment, etc.<\/p>\n

We worked diligently on our “Letter to the Birthmother,” home study, getting fingerprinted, and reading our\u00a0mandatory\u00a0books on how to be a good parent. \u00a0We filled out mountains of paperwork.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Stepping Out in Faith<\/span><\/h2>\n

\"buildings,crosses,photographs,religiousIn the meanwhile, after years of prayers, I felt like I finally had gotten an answer from God. \u00a0Basically, he told me to quit my corporate job, that I loved, and had been at for 12 years. \u00a0What? \u00a0My job? \u00a0It was my escape from the emotions of my personal life. \u00a0Did He really mean for me to quit? \u00a0It took me 3 months to obey Him.<\/p>\n

The hardest part about being out of work and not having kids as my reason for staying home was the question “What do you do?” \u00a0Ughh. \u00a0No matter how many times I was asked\u00a0that question, I never seemed to have an answer. \u00a0I simply replied, “I do nothing.” \u00a0To my dismay, people reacted with, “wow, how great would that be!” \u00a0Hmmm, I never thought of it that way.<\/p>\n

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A Sudden Surprise<\/span><\/h2>\n

\"births,checkups,childbirths,examines,expectant,expecting,females,Fotolia,healthcare,healthy,heartbeats,maternity,motherhood,mothers,parents,Photographs,pregnancies,pregnant,stethoscopes,women\"<\/p>\n

Two and a half months later, while finishing the last of my mountain of paperwork for the adoption agency, I had a whim to go waste another pregnancy test. \u00a0I couldn’t believe my eyes! \u00a0I was pregnant…naturally! \u00a0I remember going downstairs to tell my husband. \u00a0I opened my mouth and said, “I…” and then I just babbled and slobbered all over him. \u00a0He was startled, having never seen me this way before. \u00a0He didn’t know if he should rush me to the hospital or just stay there and comfort me. \u00a0When I finally got the words out, he was even more startled! \u00a0After nearly 5 years of trying, we sat there dismayed but with incredible happiness. \u00a0God had answered our prayers in His timing.<\/p>\n

Let me tell you, I was a nervous\u00a0Nellie\u00a0the first 9 weeks…I breathed a sigh of relief\u00a0after the 9 week check-up. \u00a0Then I continued as a nervous Nellie up until our beautiful healthy girl was born. \u00a0Wow. \u00a0What a miracle indeed. \u00a0In some ways I am thankful for the years of infertility. \u00a0They gave me so much more appreciation for finally having the opportunity to give birth to God’s creation.<\/p>\n

God blessed again nearly 3 years later with my son. \u00a0Next to my husband, my children are the light of my life. \u00a0I am so<\/p>\n

grateful for them and the honor to raise them as children of God.<\/p>\n

So, this Mother’s Day, I’ll be spending it with my family. \u00a0I’m looking forward to my kids’ homemade cards, family love, and home movies and recounting my kids’ birth stories and how special they are to us.<\/p>\n

\"\"

My daughter and I on her birth day.<\/p><\/div><\/p>\n

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Happy Mother’s Day!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Enjoy the time with your moms and your families. \u00a0Hug them a little tighter this year, for you are\u00a0truly\u00a0blessed.<\/p>\n

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Images source: \u00a0Microsoft Office<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

My story of the long perilous road to being a mother, infertility, and joyous love.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6916,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[14],"tags":[663,183,1129,1130],"class_list":["post-6915","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-moms","tag-infertility","tag-mothers-day","tag-mothers-testimony","tag-testimony","entry"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/wellconnectedmom.com\/blog\/p-content\/themes\/atahualpa342\/images\/articles\/2012\/05\/Baby-Kaylas-first-days-039-400.jpg?fit=400%2C300&ssl=1","jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wellconnectedmom.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6915","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wellconnectedmom.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wellconnectedmom.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wellconnectedmom.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wellconnectedmom.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6915"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/wellconnectedmom.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6915\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wellconnectedmom.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6916"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wellconnectedmom.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6915"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wellconnectedmom.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6915"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wellconnectedmom.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6915"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}